Popular Myths About Searching



Searching is illegal.
Searching in not illegal anywhere. However, check the laws in your state for clarification about the ways information can be released and to whom.

Birth mothers are promised that their child will never find them.
Few, if any, birth mothers, received or want that promise.

Searching is expensive and difficult.
Some searches can be difficult and expensive depending on a variety of circumstances. However, many searches cost very little.

No good ever comes from reunions.
Many reunions have benefits for all parties.

Searchers are unhappy people with issues.
Searchers come in all shapes, sizes and degrees of happiness with their lives.

Contacting a birth mother will ruin her life.
Although it is likely to stir things up a bit, it is unlikely that contacting a birth mother unexpectedly will ruin her life.

It is unfair to the adoptive parents for their child to search.
A search is something that adoptive parents should expect might happen some day. It is not unfair or disloyal to them to search.

Reunion will wreak havoc in your life.
Honestly, it probably will unsettle your life for a while. However, for most people it is worth the initial upheaval for the ultimate result.

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Credits: Jan Baker