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Adoption Search & Reunion

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Beginning an adoption reunion search can be the start to an emotionally difficult, yet rewarding journey. The first step is the biggest step you'll take. Deciding to begin your search and reunion journey commonly requires dedication, perseverance, and emotional and mental fortitude. Some of those who search find who they're looking for right away while others can search for years without success. Unfortunately, there isn't a way to know which category you'll fall into before you begin the process. However, even if success isn't met right away, the journey holds a lot of other benefits and advantages, including a better understanding of yourself and your life experiences.

Once you've decided to start your search, you will then have to decide how you're going to move forward. For starters, it's possible that the agency used to facilitate the adoption offers post-adoption services that include a registry or third party intermediary who will attempt to locate and contact the member of the triad you are searching for.

You can also search online directories that aren't related to a specific agency. Many of these online directories are free, including the Adoption.com Reunion Registry. Because of the modernity and popularity of social networking sites, that's a great place to start, too. Of course, these methods will only work if you already have identifying information about that person. You could also use the expertise of professional searchers, who do cost money, or search angels, who are free to work with. There are so many different ways to start and continue your reunion search, but you don't have to choose only one method. Why not try them all?

Often, services available through agencies or professional searchers do cost money, as mentioned above, so it's important to research the services you are investigating before taking that first step. Becoming active in online adoption communities will allow you to speak to others who may have used the services you are considering or it may lead you in a whole different direction altogether. However, it might be best to start with the free resources before moving on to the paid ones.

Once you've started your search, you'll want to begin the preparation for a possible reunion. It's important to keep your expectations of the relationship low and take things one step at a time. This is because you don't want to get your hopes up, have the reunion fail in some way, and become devastated. Keeping expectations low or expectations open and pliable means that you can get back up and keep trying until you're happy with the results. It's easy to get caught up in the moment and leap forward while emotions are high. However, taking time to ease into the relationship and build a strong foundation is important in the very first stages.

Try to keep communication light and easy until you've gotten to know the person a little better. Once you've gotten to know your adopted child or birth parent, you can then start to address the emotional topics, which will inevitably come up.

The reunion journey is an exciting one, even with all the bumps and hurdles along the way. Remember that every journey will be different, so try not to compare your reunion journey with others. Focus on your goal and your progression, and you'll soon be able to reconnect and reunite!

Adoption Reunion Discussions

Adoption Reunion Blogs

How to Handle the Naysayers
January 11, 2014, 11:16 am
Ladies and gentlemen, if you plan a search , or have yet to reunite physically with birth family, do this: Wear your armor of faith and...
Bonus Siblings!
January 15, 2014, 8:58 am
First and foremost, let me say this: I was blessed with wonderful siblings! I'm not talking about my natural siblings, I'm talking about my...
Little Sister, Penny
January 15, 2014, 12:51 pm
My mind was a blank slate regarding my birth siblings . Born of the same mother, as far as I knew our resemblance would end there. Before...

Adoption Reunion Forums

Unsure what to do now.
September 16, 2014, 7:45 pm
I am adopted and was born in Maine in 1961. The agency that handled the adoption was St. Andres in Biddeford, Maine. I sent for and...
ISO BS BORN: 9-28-79.GREGORY
September 12, 2014, 8:51 pm
Originally Posted By JUDY @shayes31@excite.com you were born in flint mich. i need to tell you why i put you up for adoption. i love...
What if she doesn't get my message??
September 7, 2014, 9:07 pm
No other information but I found more information because she posted on another site in 2003 but even with that I am having no luck.
Visitor Comments (500)
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Joann - 9 months ago
0 0 19
I have searched for my birth mother for almost 20 years. She found me two days ago. I am on every adoption registry site, and she found me through Facebook. I had an amazing adoptive family, but the hole in my heart is now gone. I have a huge family that has searched for me for 36 years!! I have pictures and now know where I got my eyes and my hair and my smile from. It's amazing to finally see people who look like me. I have so much in common with my new family. Never stop looking. Don't give up. It's not all sunshine and roses, but knowing where I come from and the support from my adoptive family has made my life complete. #1
j - 7 months ago
0 0 8
Please if you were adopted some of the times it is for the right reason. I did give my daughter up for adoption hoping for better than I could provide.... now I find it hard debating to open a can of worms and stir up feelings finding her or that if I do find her it will be very good...in my case if you give up a child for the right reason very heavy guilt and constant pain .. never gets easier only harder ,, every year every holdiday ever birthday, every day period #2
Debi - 3 months ago
0 0 4
I would like to help my sister-in-law find her adopted child that was adopted in Ohio back in the 50's or 60's. She left her child with her family members while she looked for a job and when she returned they had adopted her out. What is the best way for me to do this? #3
Danielle - 6 months ago
4 4 10
i am trying to find my sister. my mother gave her up for adoption when she was born and i would like to find her as a surprise for my mother. just wondering on how i go about this ? help please. #4
Guest - 7 months ago
0 0 4
Looking for birth father from East Bay Area California. I was born feb 1....1975 in Alameda and had a closed adoption. Need health information, please . Greatly appreciate any news. #5
Dawniel - 1 year ago
0 0 3
I am looking for my 2 sisters that were given up for adoption. Birth name Molly DOB Oct 20 or 21, 1980 born in Minnesota in a "closed" adoption. Younger sister birth name Chelsea adoptive name Catherine DOB Jan 6, 1986 born Houston (area) Texas in an "open" adoption. I have another sister, I grew up with, that lives in AZ and I know she is also hoping to meet our lost sisters one day as well. There is also a chance that my sister Chelsea/Catherine may also have a younger half sister, age 11, depending if we share a father (which is possible). I would love to extend my family and have all of my sisters in my life. Thank you for reading my story even if you can't help. #6
Sara - 3 months ago
0 0 2
emotional journey feels like an understatement. I am registered everywhere, and haven't found even the smallest clue. I feel like a ghost, a whisper through the wind. But I hold onto the hope that you are searching for me to. I just want a glimpse at eyes that mirror mine. Sorry I am trying to remain positive and not trying to come across as negative, and reading all your positive comments gives me hope. #7
Michael - 2 months ago
0 0 1
Male born on September 21, 1985 in Jacksonville, Florida (I think) and processed through The Children's Home Society. Supposedly my mother died before my adoption finalized in October 1985. I was told she was beaten and fell into a coma from which she never awoke. I may have two half brothers through her. I have completed 23andMe.com and found that I am largely British-Irish with hints of Polish-Russian. Contact: xxxx This is the beginning of my journey, and it already feels like the end. The Florida statutes protect the biological parents like I'm a piece of irrelevant chattel without a say in the matter. Closed adoption laws are so inhumane to adult adoptees. The very nature of human behavior and instinct is to look to your history for enlightenment. Hence, the wide popularity of archaeology and genealogy. It's human nature to investigate the past. Legislatures should be ashamed of their decisions to seal off all identifying information to adoptees. #8
Alice Alvarez - 8 months ago
0 0 2
Hi iam new at this but i had to try iam not sure if this is the way i should start but i had to start somewhere. Iam looking for my two boys Iam not sure if there names were changed but the birth names are Jusin Francisco Alvarez jr. and Christopher Francisco Alvarez jr.. They were born Dec12,1998 and May 11,2002.I the birth mother Alice Alvarez lost my as far as i know My kids were born in San Antonio Tx. If anyone sees this and you know about my kids please let me know. I just want to know how there doing i understand if they wouldnt want to meet there birth mom.My kids were adopted to a family in Mc,Callen Tx. Thank you very much. #9
Bobbie - 8 months ago
0 0 2
I'm a birth mother ... My son was born in Oakland, Ca.. Feb 9th 1964 ..You called me Your name is Gary ..Gary when you called me I was in shock ..But I loved hearing from you.... Please call me again ... I was so young when you were born ..There fore I had no choice but to adopt you to a family who could give you more than I could had ever. I have always thought about you and have loved you all my life and always will.. please call me again .. I am sorry that I could not meet you with your half sisters ..Call me and I can try to explain why .... I hope the information I gave you helped .. I hope you were able to find your birth father Steve ... Please call me again ... How I wish I had talked more to you ..But with our conversation it felt as if I was talking to a long tine friend .... thank you so much for reaching out to me ..I'm sure it was a shocking to hear my voice for the first time.. as it was for me to hear yours ...I will always be there for you if you want ... Love Bobbie #10
kimberly golden - 1 week ago
Hey I am very interested in finding my birth mother I know very little I just need some help and guidance on to what to do and steps to follow to maybe one day come by her and all of my lost siblings im 20 years old and I know her name is Rebecca thats all can anyone help?? #11
Taylor - 5 months ago
0 0 1
Hi, Im Taylor. I am a ex- foster youth and was adopted at age 9. Im currently 21 years old, i been in and out of fosterhomes, and shelters. As a child i was born with a disability that affected different parts of my body and as a comprehending disorder. When i was born, i had a lifespan to live up to 5 years old. i never knew my dad or mom . But would love to know if theres any information that can be helped to unify me and my family, as much would be appreciated. Been figuring how to and where to look. i found my real mom just last year. Being told things about my other half wasnt there. And that my adopted parents was my ” Real Parents”. And so forth. But all that i know is my dads name is Steve(Steven)Ellis. And been just trying to know who i am, my identity, my other half. And would love to be reunited. Even if my dad is not ready, to meet. Or to be in contact. But for him to know IM Alive!! #12
carol - 5 days ago
0 0 0
I am looking for my son that was put up for adoption in Colorado through the Huerfano County Social Services. He was born Russell Walter Moen on 7/7/78. I gave him up for the right reasons. In my work I meet a lot of people and when someone has his birthday I search their face for similarities. I am now ready to due a fearless search. I want him to know I really did love him, and still do.. If anyone out there could give me any advice or point me in the right direction it is greatly appreciated #13
I am looking for my birth parents - 2 weeks ago
0 0 0
My name at birth was Crystal Lynn Reeder I am 34 and born Dec. 13 1979. My birth mothersname is Justine Reeder I think she was born in 1959. I am so desperate to find out about where I came from. I was born in Dauphin County PA. I hope that she is looking for me too. I hope she hasn't forgotten about me and my brother Andrew. I have searched her name in free people searches and come up empty. I don't have the money to get the records to see if she is sill alive. Please help me. Any information that would help me find what I'm looking for will be appreciated. #14
Phyllis - 2 weeks ago
0 0 0
I am searching for a young man who was born possibly between early 1980's and 1990, possibly in Oregon. His birth father is David Thomas Dorrough who was a member of the Arkansas National Guard. I think the mother was also in the National Guard in her resident state, which was possibly Oregon. In approximately 2003 0r 2004 I received a call from a young man who had been adopted searching for his birth parents. Unfortunately, I did not know at the time my husband had been involved in multiple affairs with women resulting in at least two children. I told the young man at the time I could not help him because I knew I was not his mother. It never occurred to me, he was chasing my husband's name. I know this is a needle in a haystack, but I would appreciate any help that anyone with some experience at this can give me. Thank you #15
Renee Keith's daughter - 2 weeks ago
My father was given up for adoption in 1969. We're told his birth mother loved him and actually wanted him but being an Jamaica resident on visa in NY could not take him Bach. We're told she stayed with him until he was adopted. My adopted grand mother loved him but the rest of the family hated him. Since my grandmother has died my father has only had my brothers sister mother and I. He sometimes cries because he'd like to at least know what his biological mother looks like. Just wanted to share maybe she'd read this and would be looking for my daddy whom she named Keith . #16
Kelsabeth - 3 weeks ago
I will be 20 years old soon born Nov. 11, 1994 in burley Idaho my mothers name Martha I know I have an older sister who was taken from my mom by my grandma and she was raised in some part of Mexico and I could possibly have a younger brother I really want to find my biological sister and brother and also my biological father who tried to win custody of me but failed to show up in the court I am adopted and am in Texas please if this catches your attention and you think you may be the person I'm looking for put a reply or add me on fb meeting my real family is something I really hope for and have been looking for already a long time #17
Megan Pierson - 3 weeks ago
0 0 0
Yesterday was my dad's birthday.. It really had me Thinking whether or not she's out here looking for us? Which really there's not many days that go by that I'm not thinking about it. Maybe it's best not to know her, like a mysterious part in our heads the way we would imagine her.. A woman we might look up to.. Or she could be woman we wouldn't be proud to a accept.. So maybe it's best that we never met.. So I can put all these imaginations in my head of how an incredible woman she is.. And that I'm just like her in some ways.. To push myself to be the best that I can be! But a part of me is missing... A grandma I never got to meet. A family I never got to know. Apart of her is in me.. In my blood, running through my veins.. I am her.. So I hope one day, she'll have enough courage to meet all of us.. Cause we sure want to meet her!(: to get a restart on life.. Like finally the question all of has been wondering/ asking.. Is finally answered without hesitation. #18
Dreana - 3 weeks ago
I have been looking for birth father my whole life. I haven't found anything so I assume you aren't looking for me. I am registered on every site. My birthday is either 7/14 or 7/15/1976. Don't want or expect anything but would love to meet. I was told your name is Rob or Robin Washington. The adoption took place in Hartford, CT through Catholic Family Services. In 1xxxxx I was told you were dating Rita L. who is my birth mother who gave me your name. I was recently reunited with her. I am bi-racial and would like to know my background. I have a hole in my heart. xxxx #19
March24 1980 - 1 month ago
0 0 0
I was born on march 24 1980 at Jefferson hospital in Philadelphia . I'm looking for my birth mother after 34 years ...I I just recently got out the navy and think its time to at lease see where I come from or try for my children doing 2 tours of war has opened my eyes I need this and hopefully I will find u soon.. I'm a black male with green hazel eyes ... I was adopted through a catholic agency in Pennsylvania too a wonderful couple If ur somewhere out there I would love too meet u or chat wit u p.s I had no name at birth the adoption agency named me Brian which was later changed when I was placed with my parents now. #20
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