Adoption Search & Reunion

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Beginning an adoption reunion search can be the start to an emotionally difficult, yet rewarding journey. The first step is the biggest step you'll take. Deciding to begin your search and reunion journey commonly requires dedication, perseverance, and emotional and mental fortitude. Some of those who search find who they're looking for right away while others can search for years without success. Unfortunately, there isn't a way to know which category you'll fall into before you begin the process. However, even if success isn't met right away, the journey holds a lot of other benefits and advantages, including a better understanding of yourself and your life experiences.

Once you've decided to start your search, you will then have to decide how you're going to move forward. For starters, it's possible that the agency used to facilitate the adoption offers post-adoption services that include a registry or third party intermediary who will attempt to locate and contact the member of the triad you are searching for.

You can also search online directories that aren't related to a specific agency. Many of these online directories are free, including the Adoption.com Reunion Registry. Because of the modernity and popularity of social networking sites, that's a great place to start, too. Of course, these methods will only work if you already have identifying information about that person. You could also use the expertise of professional searchers, who do cost money, or search angels, who are free to work with. There are so many different ways to start and continue your reunion search, but you don't have to choose only one method. Why not try them all?

Often, services available through agencies or professional searchers do cost money, as mentioned above, so it's important to research the services you are investigating before taking that first step. Becoming active in online adoption communities will allow you to speak to others who may have used the services you are considering or it may lead you in a whole different direction altogether. However, it might be best to start with the free resources before moving on to the paid ones.

Once you've started your search, you'll want to begin the preparation for a possible reunion. It's important to keep your expectations of the relationship low and take things one step at a time. This is because you don't want to get your hopes up, have the reunion fail in some way, and become devastated. Keeping expectations low or expectations open and pliable means that you can get back up and keep trying until you're happy with the results. It's easy to get caught up in the moment and leap forward while emotions are high. However, taking time to ease into the relationship and build a strong foundation is important in the very first stages.

Try to keep communication light and easy until you've gotten to know the person a little better. Once you've gotten to know your adopted child or birth parent, you can then start to address the emotional topics, which will inevitably come up.

The reunion journey is an exciting one, even with all the bumps and hurdles along the way. Remember that every journey will be different, so try not to compare your reunion journey with others. Focus on your goal and your progression, and you'll soon be able to reconnect and reunite!

Adoption Reunion Discussions

Adoption Reunion Blogs

How to Handle the Naysayers
January 11, 2014, 11:16 am
Ladies and gentlemen, if you plan a search , or have yet to reunite physically with birth family, do this: Wear your armor of faith and...
Bonus Siblings!
January 15, 2014, 8:58 am
First and foremost, let me say this: I was blessed with wonderful siblings! I'm not talking about my natural siblings, I'm talking about my...
Little Sister, Penny
January 15, 2014, 12:51 pm
My mind was a blank slate regarding my birth siblings . Born of the same mother, as far as I knew our resemblance would end there. Before...

Adoption Reunion Forums

In need of a helping hand..
November 20, 2014, 3:16 pm
Was I born 11-20-1971 ? Well here it is 43yrs and I have NO idea where to go or what to do, I'm lost, frustrated, my head is spinning too....
Advice
November 12, 2014, 8:18 am
I agree with Crazy_Woman, sound advice Dickons! By the way Crazy_Woman, you took my username before I could get to it ;) haha
Looking for my mother
November 9, 2014, 3:58 am
Or if anyone that knew us please write so we can meet again.
Visitor Comments (500)
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Joann - 11 months ago
0 0 24
I have searched for my birth mother for almost 20 years. She found me two days ago. I am on every adoption registry site, and she found me through Facebook. I had an amazing adoptive family, but the hole in my heart is now gone. I have a huge family that has searched for me for 36 years!! I have pictures and now know where I got my eyes and my hair and my smile from. It's amazing to finally see people who look like me. I have so much in common with my new family. Never stop looking. Don't give up. It's not all sunshine and roses, but knowing where I come from and the support from my adoptive family has made my life complete. #1
j - 9 months ago
0 0 11
Please if you were adopted some of the times it is for the right reason. I did give my daughter up for adoption hoping for better than I could provide.... now I find it hard debating to open a can of worms and stir up feelings finding her or that if I do find her it will be very good...in my case if you give up a child for the right reason very heavy guilt and constant pain .. never gets easier only harder ,, every year every holdiday ever birthday, every day period #2
Debi - 5 months ago
0 0 8
I would like to help my sister-in-law find her adopted child that was adopted in Ohio back in the 50's or 60's. She left her child with her family members while she looked for a job and when she returned they had adopted her out. What is the best way for me to do this? #3
Guest - 9 months ago
0 0 6
Looking for birth father from East Bay Area California. I was born feb 1....1975 in Alameda and had a closed adoption. Need health information, please . Greatly appreciate any news. #4
Danielle - 9 months ago
7 4 14
i am trying to find my sister. my mother gave her up for adoption when she was born and i would like to find her as a surprise for my mother. just wondering on how i go about this ? help please. #5
Lisa - 9 months ago
1 1 4
My boyfriend (now husband) and I gave up for adoption our twin sons at birth in 1978. On July 17, 2013, we found one of the twins on this site. Five days later, and living only 45 minutes apart, we were joyously reunited with him, his wife, and two children (our grandchildren!). We were so happy to hear that the twins were raised together but learned that his brother had moved to Arizona eight years earlier. So on December 6, 2013, we flew to Arizona to meet him, his wife, and their two children (more grandchildren!). The twins were especially thrilled to find out that they have two younger full-blood brothers who share in their excitement, and their relationship is flourishing. It's been a mutual feeling of elation to be reunited, our love is growing by the day, and we are so excited to be living out the remainder of our lives together. I encourage you to keep the faith, don't ever give up searching, and hope will find a way. #6
Susan - 3 weeks ago
0 0 1
I've been looking for my biologicla brother who was adopted into another home for over 10 years now...ive sent out flyers on gfacebook and still have no contact with him...it's hard and emotionally draining anmd I find myself holding my heart because I feel a little empoty without knowing who he is,m if he's okay if I will ever meet hiim...I've had no luck and every day it seems harder and harder and further and further away from reach....I haven o one I know that is also adopted or reunited ewith family...I don't know any way to start or how to go about anything....i need help and each day it's less and less easy to find a path to go on... #7
Sara - 5 months ago
1 0 3
emotional journey feels like an understatement. I am registered everywhere, and haven't found even the smallest clue. I feel like a ghost, a whisper through the wind. But I hold onto the hope that you are searching for me to. I just want a glimpse at eyes that mirror mine. Sorry I am trying to remain positive and not trying to come across as negative, and reading all your positive comments gives me hope. #8
Megan Pierson - 3 months ago
0 0 1
Yesterday was my dad's birthday.. It really had me Thinking whether or not she's out here looking for us? Which really there's not many days that go by that I'm not thinking about it. Maybe it's best not to know her, like a mysterious part in our heads the way we would imagine her.. A woman we might look up to.. Or she could be woman we wouldn't be proud to a accept.. So maybe it's best that we never met.. So I can put all these imaginations in my head of how an incredible woman she is.. And that I'm just like her in some ways.. To push myself to be the best that I can be! But a part of me is missing... A grandma I never got to meet. A family I never got to know. Apart of her is in me.. In my blood, running through my veins.. I am her.. So I hope one day, she'll have enough courage to meet all of us.. Cause we sure want to meet her!(: to get a restart on life.. Like finally the question all of has been wondering/ asking.. Is finally answered without hesitation. #9
Michael - 4 months ago
0 0 1
Male born on September 21, 1985 in Jacksonville, Florida (I think) and processed through The Children's Home Society. Supposedly my mother died before my adoption finalized in October 1985. I was told she was beaten and fell into a coma from which she never awoke. I may have two half brothers through her. I have completed 23andMe.com and found that I am largely British-Irish with hints of Polish-Russian. Contact: xxxx This is the beginning of my journey, and it already feels like the end. The Florida statutes protect the biological parents like I'm a piece of irrelevant chattel without a say in the matter. Closed adoption laws are so inhumane to adult adoptees. The very nature of human behavior and instinct is to look to your history for enlightenment. Hence, the wide popularity of archaeology and genealogy. It's human nature to investigate the past. Legislatures should be ashamed of their decisions to seal off all identifying information to adoptees. #10
Alice Alvarez - 10 months ago
0 0 2
Hi iam new at this but i had to try iam not sure if this is the way i should start but i had to start somewhere. Iam looking for my two boys Iam not sure if there names were changed but the birth names are Jusin Francisco Alvarez jr. and Christopher Francisco Alvarez jr.. They were born Dec12,1998 and May 11,2002.I the birth mother Alice Alvarez lost my as far as i know My kids were born in San Antonio Tx. If anyone sees this and you know about my kids please let me know. I just want to know how there doing i understand if they wouldnt want to meet there birth mom.My kids were adopted to a family in Mc,Callen Tx. Thank you very much. #11
Bobbie - 10 months ago
0 0 2
I'm a birth mother ... My son was born in Oakland, Ca.. Feb 9th 1964 ..You called me Your name is Gary ..Gary when you called me I was in shock ..But I loved hearing from you.... Please call me again ... I was so young when you were born ..There fore I had no choice but to adopt you to a family who could give you more than I could had ever. I have always thought about you and have loved you all my life and always will.. please call me again .. I am sorry that I could not meet you with your half sisters ..Call me and I can try to explain why .... I hope the information I gave you helped .. I hope you were able to find your birth father Steve ... Please call me again ... How I wish I had talked more to you ..But with our conversation it felt as if I was talking to a long tine friend .... thank you so much for reaching out to me ..I'm sure it was a shocking to hear my voice for the first time.. as it was for me to hear yours ...I will always be there for you if you want ... Love Bobbie #12
Bonnie - 9 hours ago
0 0 0
Mother ISO daughter placed may 2009 by the office of child and youth. My daughter was removed from my mother's care while I was out of state trying to better our lives. My name is Bonnie Godfrey. I had my daughter until she was almost 4 years old her name is Karlina Nancy Sue Hornaman, last name may be different now. She was born at Saint Vincent Hospital in Erie, pa at 8:26 am and she weighed 6 lbs 5 Oz and was 21 inches long. She was born to myself Bonnie Godfrey and her bio father Robert Hornaman. She has Dark Brown hair and blue eyes. Her birthday is june 15 2005, please if somebody knows her please tell me so I know she is doing well. I saw her at the hospital 1 time with her adopted family and she still noticed who I was and she ran up to me screaming mommy. I really miss her and my heart breaks for her every moment of every day. Karlina or any of her adopted family please I am very sick and am scared I won't get any peace for her or my other 2 children,"for which I have". #13
Guest - 1 day ago
0 0 0
I am looking for a half brother that was given up for adoption born in Pasco county Florida Oct 11,1968. Not sure of too many details as it was a big family secret that all but destroyed the family. My sisters and I have found the remains of the first set of six siblings from first marriage two weeks ago. Very nice people,it turns out they were looking for us too. 46 years to catch up on. turns out not only are there different versions of the truth but none of us had the whole story. more is coming out the deeper I dig ,very confusing. The male child we are looking for received ss survivor benefits ( I believe). And is not only our brother but cousin as well. We have knowledge of both sides of his family and would love to find him. his birth mother had placed him in Winter Haven Fl at some point in history. As a result of the last 2 weeks we do not believe she truly tried to connect to him. The past is the past,none of us had anything to do with it . #14
Jim - 3 days ago
0 0 0
Looking for my friend, an adoptee, for the surname "Dobson". Grandfather, born in England, born 1891, mill worker in the U.S. Grandmother, born in England, born 1894, homemaker in the U.S. Mother – Mary Dobson - Born 1923, middle name is unknown. Siblings - two older brothers and two younger sisters What I have found: • The latest census that Mary Dobson could have been tied to her parents on census records would be 1930. She would have been seven years old. By 1940, she was seemingly on her own as a maid/housekeeper and may have been working for the family that hired her when she was 12 in 1935. • I did not find her on any 1940 census indicating she was a housemaid or maid or servant or any other title for that matter. I just did not find her, period. Records as to surname indicate that Dobson is correct. However, it may have been changed a little or a lot to hide parentage and so, I would like to know of any other surname that fits the criteria above. It's a long shot but, anyo #15
Joanell - 3 days ago
0 0 0
I have been searching for my birth parents are now for several years with no info so far. I was born in Oak Hill, Ohio which is in Jackson County. My birthdate is April 24, 1959 and I was delivered by Dr. Claude Hambrick a friend of the family. I know my birthmother was very young but that is all Dr. Hambrick can remember, also that her name may have been Smith or Jones. I have a hole in my heart that needs to be healed. My mother and father are both deceased now and I feel they would want me to know . I have a brother that is about 3 yrs younger than me and he was born just after my adopted brother. I have had a wonderful life with wonderful parents! I just want to know about them if I can before I die. I am a hospice nurse and I see every day the pain of not knowing at the end.....thank you! #16
Jennifer - 1 week ago
0 0 0
Hello, I am looking for my birth mother/father/any family. I was born April 20,1974 in Muncie, Indiana. I was adopted at the age of 6 months. Thats all I have to go on. I have blue eyes and was born with red hair. I know a couple things I have health issues with is hereditary. One trait one of my parents would probably have is called familial tremors. Me and 3 of my childre share this trait. Our hands shake ecspecially when we get nervous or have had to much caffeine. Ive always wanted to know who my birth parents are and where I come from and if I have any siblings out there. I have been told by many they know or have seen people who look just like me within a 50 mile area. I have even been called by a different name by strangers before. I feel like my biological family is so close to me yet so far away. I hope one day we can meet!!! I have 5 children of my own and one grandchild. Please any help I can get would be loved! #17
Jeri - 1 week ago
0 0 0
Hi, I'm a Birth Mother looking for her child who just turned 45yrs of age in the passed couple of months. As always on the birth date Sept. 1969 I re-live that experience and try to remember as much as I can. I think the adopting parents last name is Hatfield. The obgyn-doctor handled the adoption and the lawyer who I don't remember came to hospital far me to sign papers in Augusta, Georgia. I wasn't allowed to see or hold my child and when I asked what gender my child was the doctor said it was for my own good that I not know. I know your out there and would love the opportunity to meet you. #18
Lori - 1 week ago
0 0 0
I am searching for my biological parents/siblings. I have been told by my adopted Mother that my biological mother was a minor and that she was from another town and was sent to Clinton,Iowa during her pregnancy and delivery. I was brought home by my adopted family from the hospital at 3 days old. The only information I have is a few receipts, as it was a private adoption. Attorney, Rodney Schroeder and doctor that delivered me, Dr. Nelken. A third partyis listed on 'for the account of' line written as Bertha or Butha, Scott other than that I have not much to go on - I was born on March 3, 1968 at St. Joseph Mercy Hospital/ Jane Lamb in Clinton, Iowa - Any contact with my birth parents or possible siblings would be very much welcomed - thank you to anyone that could help me in my journey. #19
Donna - 1 week ago
0 0 0
Looking for my birth mother, father and any siblings My birth date is March 18, 1967. I believe I was born at Coney Island Hospital in Brooklyn, NY. Not positive about the hospital. My mother may have been a college student when she was pregnant, which would put her between 18 and 24. I was adopted into the McDermott family from Long Island. I was adopted at 6 months old from Spencer-Chapin adoption agency in Brooklyn NY. I have been wanting to find my biological mother and family for many years but feared to because I didn't want to hurt my adoptive parents. I have their blessing now. I have always had a whole in my heart/life not knowing where I came from and who my family is. I was adopted first and then my brother was adopted four years later. My mother was told she couldn't have children that's why they adopted. She then got pregnant when I was around 10 or 11 and then had another so they could grow up together. I was not like my siblings or my parents, so I never fit in #20
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